KidSongs
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Behold! The pure embodiment of the “It’s Made for Kids” excuse.
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KidSongs was a show targeted at children from 2-6 that aired on PBS Kids from December 3, 1985 –July 7, 1998 that was about children who sing songs from the 1920s-1990s and some original songs to appeal to children.
Synopsis
A group of fun and energetic kids run their own TV show, acting as the hosts, producers and writers. Featuring music videos from the Kidsongs home video series.
Why It Sucks
- The premise, as stated in the theme song, is nonsensical because it's about a group of bratty children who pester Hollywood producers TO USE THEIR STUDIO TO PRODUCE A SHOW and they, reluctantly agree. "Let me ask a question/Can we use the studio?/Don't you say 'no'" This sounds very entitled.
- The biggles, Billy and Ruby, are very annoying, have no personalities, and seem to add nothing to the plot. They also are very creepy to look at.
- Also, Ruby is supposed to be older than Billy but the puppetry poorly conveys it due to them being the same height.
- The Scarecrow in the Old McDonald music video is also very terrifying.
- The acting ranges from bad to medicore. The children are decent, but the adults on the show sound disinterested and bored, the biggles have grating voices, and in the episode where it's Billy's birthday, the biggles' father is clearly voiced by a prepubescent boy trying to sound like an adult, it sounds like a little boy making fun of his father. Why can't they hire an actual adult to voice the father?
- The show has terrible song choices for its target audience. While it's fun to play old songs for children, some of the songs have subject manner that is not appropriate for its target audience:
- In the dance episode, the closing song is "Over and Over" which is actually about a man falling for a woman who thinks he's too immature for her. The biggles' quips ruin the song too.
- The "I Can Do It" episode is full of those examples, like, they play All Shook Up, which is about a woman to play over the dog bathing scene and in the scene where they attempt to teach good health. The song they sing is “Button Your Overcoat” which offers health advice more appropriate for middle-aged adults, not toddlers and preschool-aged children, such as taking naps as 3:00 p.m. sharp and one grain of sugar can cause health problems. The chorus is also bad for the culture, because the “you belong to me” lyric discourages individualism and literally makes children think they’re someone’s property and not their own people. While the lyric was there because the song was written in the 1950s, back when women were not viewed as people, the show came out at a time when women were seen as people. So, it’s jarring they did not change the lyrics to better match their target audience.
- They also unintentionally to teach bad morals to their target audience:
- During the “I Can Do It” episode, they sing a song called “Peanut Butter and Jelly” which inaccurately teaches children how to make their own peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. As the lyrics state that the children have to smash peanuts WITH THEIR BARE HANDS, which is impossible unless you’re Superman or the Hulk, and squish grapes and slap it on the bread slices. That not only sounds disgusting and unappetizing, but that’s not how to make peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, and really encourages children to make a big mess in the kitchen. It would’ve been better if the song told children to take jars of peanut butter and jelly out of the cupboards and fridge. Don’t believe us? Listen to the song yourself.
- The Petting Zoo song inaccurately sings about petting zoos. While it starts off innocently, as the song goes on. The song states that the titular petting zoo has animals that are too dangerous to be at a petting zoo such as lions, bears, and monkeys. These animals ARE FEROCIOUS and can and will attack people who try to interact with them. Monkeys have been known to throw poop at those who threaten them and there have been many reports of monkeys EVEN EATING PEOPLE’S genitalia. Given the target audience is toddlers and preschool-aged children, some of children who watch the show are likely not potty trained themselves and a frightening news report once revealed that monkey ATE THE GENITALIA of a baby boy, whose mother decided to change his diaper in front of the monkey habitat at a zoo in China, so it just shows how dangerous these animals are, and why they are never at petting zoos. To make matters worse, the music video even features the children playing with said animals which encourages children to play with wild animals, which is dangerous, as the animal could attack or in some cases, eat the child and they could get many dangerous diseases that are carried by the animals. Given the animals are babies in song is also bad, because their mothers will immediately attack the children who are playing with their babies and the babies will grow up to be dangerous, unless you care for an animal properly without threatening the wild animal. Why would they include dangerous wild animals being at a petting zoo? This person should be arrested for having such animals there.
- The show also talks down to its audience at times too, it’s like they think children are very dumb. The best example is their commercial advertising their DVDs, they don’t say it’s a DVD, they say “put it in the machine, and it plays and plays, again and again, a mom’s dream come true.” They should at least tell their audience that it’s a DVD.
- The show even states that it’s made “by kids, for kids” which is insulting because of the messages they teach and the way they talk to the audience at times.
- The Bare Footin’ song can easily be taken the wrong way in the show.
Redeeming Qualities
- Not all the songs are poorly chosen or written bad, they do sing fun songs that don’t try to convey a bad lesson and are just fine for young children to listen to such as At the Hop, 5 Little Monkeys, and How Does Your Garden Grow?
- Some episodes do teach good lessons like the trains episode.
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