Taxi 3 (video game)

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Taxi 3 (video game)

If you though that the already abysmal Taxi 2 game was terrible, then think again and you will even prefer Taxi 5 over this atrocious game.
Genre(s): Racing
Platform(s): PlayStation 2
Nintendo GameCube
Game Boy Color
Game Boy Advance
PC
Release Date: January 30, 2003
Developer(s): Nemosoft
Publisher(s): Ubisoft
Country: France
Series: Taxi
Predecessor: Taxi 2


Taxi 3 is a racing video game based on the film Taxi 3, it was released for the GameCube, PlayStation 2, Game Boy Color and the Game Boy Advance in 2003.

Plot

The story repeats the main driving scenes shown in the film from which the game is adapted . The player drives Daniel's Peugeot 406 . The game takes place in Marseille and the Alps

Why It Can't Catch The Santa Claus Gang

Note: Only the PS2 and GameCube versions will be talked about

GameCube version

  1. The graphics, even for a 2003 GameCube game, are absolutely abysmal, appaling, awful, and extremely dull at the same time, with some of the worst graphics on the entire system, even games such as Pikmin, Bomberman Generation, Super Monkey Ball and it's sequel, Pac-Man World 2 and Shrek on Xbox all look better, and these games were released between 2002 and 2003, around the same time this game was released; in fact, even Taxi 2 on PS1 looks a bit better, despite that game also having abysmal graphics.
    • The color palette is extremely dull and very unappealing to look at, even for a 2003 GameCube game, with the colors being extremely terrible and even making you want to throw up by looking at them due to how bad they are, and yes, the graphics of this game are that horrible.
    • The cars 3D models are also extremely terrible to look at and are even as bad-looking as Taxi 2, as of course the cars are not that colorful, so they look extremely bad. Even for the times, games like the first [Burnout] had better 3D car models than this game, and that game came out in 2002.
    • Even some games on the PS1 and Nintendo 64 look better than this game, such as South Park (N64 version only), Mortal Kombat: Special Forces, Taxi 2, Mega Man Legends, Pac-Man World, Bomberman 64: The Second Attack, along with Bomberman Hero all look better, and these were released between 1998 and 2002.
    • Not to mention that despite how bad the graphics are, the PS2 version, despite being more colorful, had even worse graphics that are extremely undetailled and look even more like a PS1 and Nintendo 64 game.
  2. The presentation is extremely terrible for a 2003 GameCube game, as the menu is very lazily made and it is overall extremely poorly made, not to mention that even some NES games such as Super Mario Bros. 3 looks better than this game presentation; no jokes, it's this bad; even the also terrible PS2 version had a better or even a decent presentation than this version.
  3. Horrible controls that are almost as horrible, if not even worse than Taxi 2 or Bomberman Fantasy Race controls, are here; they are extremely unresponsive and so slippery that they make the game completely unplayable, yeah, this game is this bad; even Taxi 2 was more playable than this game.
    • Not to mention that due to how terrible they are and the level design being very bad and not adapted to them, it's made this game an absolute chore to play and completely unplayable.
  4. Extremely terrible level design that is even worse than the PlayStation 2 version, as here there are a huge amount of obstacles that, due to how horrible the controls are, are almost impossible to dodge, and some of the levels are timed, so it's made everything much worse than ever.
    • Not to mention that the timed levels are even worse than the main levels, and due to how terrible the controls are, as said before, they are almost impossible to beat, thanks to how bad both the level design and controls are.
  5. While there are cutscenes, like the PlayStation 2 version of the game, they last even less than 5 seconds, no where absolutely not kidding, they sometimes last 4 or even 1 seconds, not to mention that it's make the plot very confusing and is practically non-existent for this version, at least Taxi 2 had cutscenes that last a bit more seconds and even had dialogues in them.
    • Not to mention that they are entirely taken from the film itself, making it extremely lazy and overly showing how low quality this game is.
  6. Poor soundtrack that is very limited for a GameCube game, as it is extremely repetitive to the point of making the soundtrack annoying, as if it'd not been for the 10-second loop, it would have been at least average or even decent. This problem would also be seen in the PS2 version, but even worse.
    • To make matters worse, the soundtrack for the most parts doesn't play for most of the levels; at least the PS2 version had music for all of its stages.
  7. When you touch a car, you have to see every time a small cutscene in slow motion where it's spinning with both your car and the cars that you hit. This is extremely annoying and also tedious.
    • It's also a rip-off of the feature of Burnout 2 but was made much worse and less worthy, which makes these small cutscenes not only awful but completely pointless.
  8. Awful loading, despite being a bit better than the PS2 version, as here it is comparable to Mega Man X7 loading times, as it can take around 10 to even 15 seconds to load, which makes everything even worse considering how bad the game is, not to mention that it's making the game even more boring.
  9. Extremely short length, as you can beat the entire game in only 35 minutes, which is unacceptable for a GameCube game. Even for a racing game, Burnout is longer than this game, and it was released in 2002 (despite that game also being short).
  10. The description of the levels is very nonsensical since it can be a bit misleading, as the second mission, for example, consists of riding Lilly to the hospital and protecting her baby. However, this information seems false as you can still win if you do take a lot of damage, and there aren't any cutscenes that show the taxi taking Lilly and her baby to the hospital, which would create a plot hole.
  11. Even when compared to the already abysmal PlayStation 2 version of the game, this GameCube version is filled with even more glitches than the PS2 version since you can sometimes literally fly up and die, or even crash the game. No matter what, it isn't free that the game might glitch just to make you angry or even do it due to being one of the worst games of all time (yes, this game is so bad that it can be considered one of the worst games of all time).
  12. There are only 3 continues, and after that, it's game over. Yes, only 3 continues, despite how unbalanced this game is in terms of difficulty (see pointer 13 for more information about that). Not only that, but it's forcing you to save the game, despite how short it is, thanks to how poor the continue system is.
  13. The game difficulty is all over the place, being either easy or way too hard to the point of being nearly unbeatable, especially with the timed levels where you had to be extremely fast just to not lose, and it's so annoying and tedious. At least the PS2 version, despite being too easy, wasn't as tedious (despite still being incredibly tedious) as this version, thanks to how unbalanced this game is.
  14. This game had without jokes one of the worst endings that you will ever see on the GameCube, as it's for some reasons like try next mission, but it's not finished. After you do continue, you are only rewarded with a 4 second clip of the movie, and it's goes abruptly to the credits sequence. Even some NES games had better endings than this game's.
    • It's also make the game an absolute waste of times to play, considering how terrible the game is, even Taxi 2 was less of a waste of times and that game could actually be fun if you like playing terrible game or even to be a so bad It's good game, but Taxi 3 is a so bad It's bad game, even the film that this game is based on was less bad than this game.
  15. For some reason, after you beat the last level, the screen still says next mission, despite the fact that you had beat all the levels of the game. This is pretty weird, even for a low-quality game like this.
  16. You get some kits after you beat a level sometime, but the problem is that there's absolutely nothing that changes to your car, and you can't customize the car, making this information false.
  17. This game is a massive downgrade from Taxi 2 in almost every way, which had to be seen to be believed due to how bad that game already was. This counts mostly on the awful graphics and even the soundtrack itself.
    • The level design is also even worst than Taxi 2 as here it is even more boring and absolutely horrible due to the terrible controls and the horribly unbalanced difficulty of this game.
  18. The cutscenes are of poor quality, even for a GameCube game, as they're very dull compared to the movie itself, not to mention that the cutscenes are taken from the film, making this even worse.
  19. The game is not even that faithful to the already mediocre movie that Taxi 3 already was, as due to how bad the graphics are, Marseille doesn't even look faithful to the real one since it is so empty, and even if it's not a PlayStation 4 game, it could have been possibly a bit better if the developers put more care into this game, not only in terms of the graphics and faithfulness of the game but also in general.
  20. This, along with Taxi 2 and the terrible PlayStation 2 version, shows Ubisoft at their absolute worst in terms of cash grabs and terrible games, as here it's possibly the worst game they ever published, along with Imagine Party Babyz which is almost, if not a bit better than this game, and it's saying something since that game was also absolutely terrible.
    • Fortunately, they did recover with games such as Rayman 3: Hoodlum Havoc and Beyond Good & Evil which we're also released in 2003. Since these games we're much better and we're really good too, they would also recover with other good games during the 2000s.
    • It's would not be until the 2010s where they are in their downfall so luckily this game doesn't caused their downfall.

PlayStation 2 version

  1. Much like the GameCube version, the graphics are very ugly, but in this port it is even worse, with even fewer details than the GameCube version, despite being more colorful, even games such as Mega Man X7, Pac-Man World 2, Sonic Heroes, Ape Escape 2, Doraemon: Minna de Asobou, Mortal Kombat: Deadly Alliance, Bomberman Generation and Bomberman Jetters all look better than this game, and they were released between 2002 and 2003; in fact, this PS2 version even looks like a PS1 game due to how poor the graphics are.
    • The car 3D models, much like the GameCube version, are very terrible and are unnapealing to look at, despite being more colorful than in the GameCube version. Not only that, but they managed to be much better in the decent Game Boy Advance version, which is an embarrassment considering that the GBA is weaker than the PS2 and even the PS1.
    • Not to mention that even some PS1 and Nintendo 64 games such as Bomberman 64, Pac-Man World, Ape Escape, South Park on the Nintendo 64, Taxi 2 and even Ojamajo Doremi Dokkan: Nijiiro Paradise (despite being 2D in the graphics) all look better, and these games were released between 1997 and 2002, with most of these games having 3D graphics.
  2. Despite having a bit better controls than the GameCube version, they still are incredibly awful and make the game almost unplayable, as here it is either unresponsive, slippery, or way too responsive at the same times. Yes, the controls are this bad, not to mention that they ruin the fun that this game could have had, like what the GBC and GBA ports did in terms of fun when they were decent and fun games, but the PS2 version, just like the GameCube version, isn't any fun.
  3. Like the GameCube version, it is way too short and might actually be even shorter than the GameCube version, as you can beat it in less than 40 minutes, although that might be a good thing due to how bad this game is.
    • Not to mention that it's unacceptable for a 2003 PS2 game since most racing games at the time take 2 to 4 hours of gameplay, much like the GameCube, and due to that, the game could have been released for the arcade instead.
  4. The loading times are absolutely atrocious and are so bad that they're even on par with Sonic '06. and Mega Man X7. As here, it can take 20 to 25 minutes! Even though the GameCube port had faster loading times than this version, this might also possibly mean that the game might have been rushed.
    • Not only that, but it's making the game even more boring, as with the 25 seconds, you will want to do something else due to how bad these loading screens can be, like playing soccer or other better racing games than this one.
    • There's also a ton of loading, so good luck not being annoyed with them.
  5. Bland presentation that is even more lazy than the GameCube version presentation, as here it's had a way too simple menu screen (although it's still better than the GameCube version menu screen), and it's feel like you play a SNES game (in a bad way) rather than a 2003 PS2 game, kind of like the Agent Hugo games on the PS2, still these even these games had better presentation than this.
  6. Just like the GameCube version, the soundtrack is poor and extremely repetitive, with some songs that are 10 seconds long, and while they can be catchy, they are still very bad because of that, thanks to how the short loop greatly ruined the soundtrack of the game.
  7. Like the GameCube version, the cutscenes are way too short and last only 2 to 5 seconds, which also shows a sign of laziness by the developer, not to mention that even if this version is a bit better than the GameCube version, it's still incredible bad and feels like it's going to be even worse than Taxi 2.
    • Not to mention that it's again making the plot full of plot holes and even non-existent due to how short these cutscenes are. Taxi 2 at least had longer cutscenes that explain the plot well and even make the game faithful to the Taxi 2 film, but in this game it's making the plot even worse than the film itself, as remember how poorly received the third film was, this makes the plot even worse.
  8. Poor level design that is extremely boring, even when compared to the GameCube port, at least it doesn't make this version too unbalanced, as it is easier than the GameCube version.
  9. The game is also glitchy, especially with the textures, as you can be on top of a texture and it'll glitch out, and you might even be locked into the textures, thanks to how badly programmed the game was.
  10. The game difficulty is way too easy, despite being a superior change to the GameCube version since you can beat the game extremely easily, and considering how abysmal the length of the game is, it doesn't even help at all, making this a bit of a problem, especially for people who prefer harder racing games or even the hardest games in general.
  11. Like the already unfaitful GameCube version, this game isn't that faithful to the movie, despite being more faithful than the GameCube version of the game.

Redeeming Qualities

  1. At least the PS2 version is easier than the GameCube version, as while most levels are timed, they give much more time so that you can beat the levels and even the game easily, so at least this port is not as tedious as the GameCube version.
  2. The Game Boy Advance and Game Boy Color versions of the game are quite decent, and ironically, they ended up being the best Taxi games to be ever released, as they have fun gameplay and a much better soundtrack, especially the graphics.
    • The Game Boy Advance version is a pseudo 3D racing game, which is pretty impressive for a GBA game, and it was very well made, even when compared to the Need for Speed GBA games.
    • The Game Boy Color version of this game is a 2D racing game, and it is very fun and might be even better than the Game Boy Color version of Taxi 2 (which was also good), and the difficulty is pretty challenging.
  3. While they are both terrible, at leadt it's one of the few games in the 2000s where in the home consoles ports it was completely different than the other game, this is a pretty good choice since it's would offer a different game and one would be the superior, unfortunately as said before many times, both games are extremely terrible and some of the worst racing games you would ever play.

Reception

Despite not being that much reviewed due to being released only in french due to the obscurity of the film series in the United States, Taxi 3 received overwelmingly negative reviews by both players and critics alike, with them saying that this game might be one of the worst games of all times, and especially being one of the absolute worst game of both the PS2 and GameCube.

Jeuxvidéo.com give the GameCube version a 4/20[1] and heavily criticized the repetitive levels objectives such as having to go hard, slow down three fractions of a second so as not to be spotted by the bad guys, engage the turbo to arrive on time, the atrocious controls, the terrible collision detection and even the soundtrack where they said that it's was really annoying, in other words they described the game like: Les améliorations graphiques ne nous enlèvent pas de l'idée que Taxi est encore un jeu abusant d'une licence pour remplir les poches de ses producteurs à l'insu du grand public toujours prêt à se ruer sur de tels produits. A éviter à tout prix.

Jeuxvidéo.com also give the PS2 version a 4/20[2], the test was pretty similar to how they reviewed the GameCube version, such as criticizing the repetivitness of the game, the poor soundtrack, the awful lot of glitchs, the atrocious controls and the fast that most of the cars on the roads are mostly the same, and described the game: Taxi 3 PS2 fait encore plus fort que Taxi 3 PC en se permettant d'être encore moins jouable. Encore un bel exemple d'un jeu trop vite sorti et ne répondant qu'à l'appel du fric de ses producteurs. A éviter à tout prix.

Jeuxvidéo.com give the PC a 5/20[3], they criticized the terrible controls, the boring gameplay, the terrible graphics and the fact that the cutscenes we're very pixelated and of poor quality, they also criticized the short lenght and described the game: En deux mots, il devrait y avoir des lois contre ce genre de jeu. Le premier bidouilleur venu vous fait la même chose sur son 486 DX et le balance gratos sur le net. Là, on nous propose une superbe arnaque, une bonne licence bien juteuse qui surfe sans vergogne sur le succès annoncé d'un film qui assurera les ventes de la pire des daubes. Une fois de plus, on prend les joueurs pour des buses.

However, they given the Game Boy Advance version a 10/20[4], they praised the graphics, the controls and the length have been more praised than the other versions, they described the game: Taxi 3 sur GBA ne s'en tire finalement pas si mal que ça puisqu'il parvient à compenser certaines lourdeurs de gameplay par un principe de progression peu banal. Avec une réalisation correcte et un contenu honorable, il se positionne joliment parmi les productions les plus moyennes disponibles sur GBA. Un bel effort de la part d'un épisode vidéoludique de Taxi.

Jeuxvidéo.com also given the Game Boy Color version a 10/20[5], praising the graphics and the controls but criticized the gameplay, they described the game: Taxi 3 sur GBC est un simple copier/coller de la version précédente, et ne parvient pas du tout à renouveler le concept de la série. Les courses sont certes rapides, mais elles manquent franchement d'intérêt. Un titre qui ne mérite certainement pas le succès qu'il va probablement rencontrer grâce à l'engouement du public autour du film.

Trivia

  • This is the last Taxi game ever made, as both Taxi 4 and Taxi 5 would never seen tie-in video games, and these movies also got negative reviews.

Videos

Full Game

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Gameplay/Reviews

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References

  1. ↑ https://www.jeuxvideo.com/jeux/gamecube-ngc/00011681-taxi-3.htm
  2. ↑ https://www.jeuxvideo.com/jeux/playstation-2-ps2/00009743-taxi-3.htm
  3. ↑ https://www.jeuxvideo.com/jeux/pc/00009742-taxi-3.htm
  4. ↑ https://www.jeuxvideo.com/jeux/gameboy-advance-gba/00009744-taxi-3.htm
  5. ↑ https://www.jeuxvideo.com/jeux/gameboy-g-boy/00009745-taxi-3.htm

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